Children of the Cloth*

There are whole blogs devoted to cloth diapering.  Really.  Whole blogs.  And yes, I have subscribed to some of them.  Why?  Well, anybody who reads this blog (all 2? of you--hi!) knows that I do cloth diaper my babies, and have for quite some time.  I thought that these blogs might have some useful tips and/or tricks**, but really, they don't.  They do have product reviews, which could be nice if you're in the market for new cloth diapers.  But mostly it's just OHMYGODMYCLOTHDIAPERSARESOFREAKINGCUTE wanking.

Over diapers.
You know, the things babies shit in and you have to either wash or throw away.
Yeah, those.

I mean yeah, they're cute and all, and maybe it's me who's weird, but I just can't get all worked up over them.  In my mind they're for befouling, not for mixing, matching and obsessing over.  Yeah, occasionally I know that Maggie's diaper is going to be visible underneath a dress, and I might choose a diaper or cover that kind of matches, but I certainly don't go out of my way to do it.  I have one of the simpler diaper stashes*** around.  Basically two kinds, and 3 colors.  And I see absolutely no reason to go beyond that.  For me, cloth diapering was about simplifying my life, spending less money and maybe, just maybe leaving a slightly smaller footprint than one normally does with three kids.

But for some people that's not so true.  There seems to be a whole subculture of people who have made cloth diapering a hobby.  They're willing to spend hundreds, even thousands of dollars on a huge stash of diapers in different prints and colors.  One company**** has really cashed in on this and offers limited edition diapers that go for $25-$35 dollars.  These things get wait-listed.  Waist-listed, people, for diapers.

Now don't get me wrong, if you have the money, and you want to spend it this way, more power to you.  There are far worse things to collect (and let's face it, that's what you're doing at this point--collecting) than cloth diapers (Precious Moments figurines come to mind).  But I think that these types of blogs and cloth diaperers (not a word, I know--stop judging me) do a disservice to cloth diapering.  When I first went searching for advice I was completely overwhelmed by what seemed to be an endless supply of options.  Expensive options.  These women own a lot of fucking diapers (a shitload?).  I was looking to save money, not spend it.

Fortunately there are a couple of forums out there that have reasonable advice from average everyday cloth diapering families.  Using a lot of this information I was able to put a very reasonable (boring) stash together for relatively little money.  There is really noo need for a ton of diapers, 'cause no matter how many you have you've still got to wash them pretty often 'cause people shit in them.  No need for fancy either, just soft and absorbent.  If this type of information were more available to the average "cloth diaper" google-er that more people might try it (I'm going to assume that a person who's gone out of his/her way to actually google cloth diapers has already gone beyond the OMG there's poop factor).  And that's not a bad thing.


*This is a bad reference to Children of the Corn.  No, I don't usually compare that movie to my kids' diapers, but I was also thinking that it feels like early fall today and that soon it would be time to watch that movie.  I watch it every year in the fall.

**There can definitely be tips/tricks involved in cloth diapering.  Yes, I do realize that the mechanics behind it are crazy simple.  Insert cloth, shit, remove, wash, repeat.  But, there can be washing issues, fabric issues, putting them on issues, etc.  Unfortunately the typical cloth diaper blog answer to these questions involves buying more stuff that you can only get from online companies.

***Stash in this case does not refer to the same thing it did when we were in college.  Amongst the mommy spends too much money circles (cloth diaperers, babywearers) it also refers to your collection of cloth diapers or baby carriers.  I don't know how that term came into use.  I have theories.  I'd go into them, but my son is climbing on the counter.

****Yes, I know they're handmade with organic fabric by WAHMs (work at home moms) who get a living wage, etc.  But I don't care.  Let those bitches go to Tot Lot and make silly blogs like the rest of us.