Today I went to the mall

and learned that I should have stayed home. It's 5 days until Christmas and the placed was packed (even on a Monday morning) and people were grumpy, myself included. I do have a couple words (and they are not "Merry Christmas") for some people.

First one goes out to the woman who felt the need to dart past my pregnant self and my squirming child to rush into the family bathroom. I somehow doubt it was an emergency as you had plenty of time to complain about the smell. It's a "family" bathroom. That's why there's a tiny little toilet in there across from the big toilet. It's dirty and and stinky and it is not for middle-aged women who like a little privacy while they read. There is a very large, very clean bathroom less than 20 feet away that is intended for everybody. Use it.

Second one goes out to the older couple in the toothpaste aisle at Target. Was it really necessary to literally push me out of your way in search of a SpinBrush? I am glad you chose not to push past the nice lady with the oxygen, but maybe you could have extended the courtesy me, too. I understand you were trying to find that toothbrush just like yours that the grandkids like (thanks for letting myself and all of the surrounding aisles know), but I highly doubt that there's going to be a last-minute holiday rush on them. By the way, the toothbrush in the Christmas stocking? Yeah, that'll make you popular. Ask my stepmother about that one (if she's still alive, haven't talked to her in over a decade or two).

Last one goes to the older woman who felt it necessary to stage whisper not once, but twice the fact that my son was without shoes and socks and that somebody should call somebody else to do something about that. Had you put your keen observational skills to good use you may have noticed that I was carrying said socks and shoes. Furthermore, while I have not researched the subject entirely, I am quite certain that no toddler has ever suffered the loss of a toe to frostbite while in Target or the Food Court. Perhaps in the future you could be a bit more direct and just let me know that my son is missing his shoes and/or socks. I might actually appreciate that as sometimes I don't notice when he pulls them off and throws them at random passersby.

I will be happy when Christmas is over and we can have our nice, quiet weekday mall back.